Why don't Japanese people say "I love you"? (2)

Today's article is a continuation of the previous article, "Why don't Japanese people say I love you?

Click here for the previous article

今日の記事は先日の「日本人はなぜ愛してると言わないのか」というテーマの続きです。

前回の記事はこちら

Japanese people don't say many direct words of love.

日本人は直接的に愛の言葉をあまり言わない

In Japan, there is no custom of kissing or hugging. They also don't say direct words of love very often.

This may have something to do with the characteristics of Japanese houses.

日本にはキスやハグの習慣がありません。また、直接的な愛の言葉を言う事はあまりありません。

それは日本住宅の特徴に関係あるかもしれません。

Characteristics of Traditional Japanese Houses

伝統的な日本家屋の特徴

Compared to the rest of the world, Japanese houses are small.

In order to make efficient use of a small house, 襖(ふすま)fusuma (sliding doors) are used instead of walls or doors between rooms in traditional Japanese houses.

Fusuma can be used as movable partitions to freely change the layout of the rooms.

日本の家は世界に比べて狭いです。

狭い家を効率的に使うため、伝統的な日本家屋では部屋と部屋の間は壁やドアの代わりに襖が使われています。

襖は動く間仕切りとして部屋の間取りを自由に変えることができます。

In summer, you can remove the fusuma to create a spacious and cool space with a breeze, and in winter, you can close the fusuma to increase the heating effect.

夏場は取り外して広々と風の通る涼しい空間に、冬はふすまを閉めて暖房効果を上げる事ができます。

In the old days, weddings and funerals were often held at home, and by removing the fusuma doors, a large room could be created to accommodate a large number of guests.

In addition, a room that is usually used widely can be partitioned into fusuma (sliding doors) to create a room for guests.

昔は冠婚葬祭を家で行う事も多く、襖を外す事で大きな部屋を作り、大勢の来客が入れるようにもしました。

また、逆に普段広く使っている部屋を来客時にはふすまで仕切り、部屋を作る事ができます。

Although the sliding doors are very convenient, they are not airtight, so we can feel the presence of our family members even if they are in the next room across the sliding doors.

とても便利な襖ですが、密閉性はないため、襖を隔てた隣の部屋にいても家族の気配を感じます。

The Custom of Babies and Parents Sleeping Together

赤ちゃんと添い寝をする習慣

In Japan, there has always been a custom for babies and their parents to sleep in the same room, and even today, in most households, parents and babies sleep together.

This is not only because of the small size of the house, but also because of the traditional value that it is good for parents and children to be closely involved in raising their children.

日本では昔から赤ちゃんと親が同じ部屋で寝る習慣があり、現在でもほとんどの家庭で親と赤ちゃんが一緒に寝ています。

これは家が狭いためという理由だけでなく、親子が密接に関わり合いながら育てるのが良いという伝統的な価値観も関係しています。

Today, 40% to 50% of children in elementary school still sleep with their parents.

現在では、小学生になっても40％〜50％の子供が親と一緒に寝ているそうです。

Reference:

https://tg-uchi.jp/topics/5098

Sleeping styles vary from family to family, but one of the most common sleeping styles with infants is the "川(かわ)の字(字)river figure" sleeping style.

In this sleeping style, the child is in the middle and the parents are at both ends. It looks like the kanji for "川(かわ)river," doesn't it?

It is said that children grow up feeling the love and affection of both parents.

I used to sleep in the  "川(かわ)の字(字)river figure" until I was in elementary school.

寝方は家庭によってさまざまですが、乳幼児期の子供との寝方で、「川の字」と言う寝方も一般的です。

川の字は子供を真ん中にして、両親が両端に寝る寝方です。「川」という漢字に似ているでしょ？

子どもは両親どちらの愛情も十分に感じながら育つと言われています。

私も小学生になるまでは、「川の字」で寝ていました。

The Habit of Reading Between the Lines

空気を読む習慣

My mother used to say that as soon as she heard a baby crying, she would know the cause.

Was it hungry, a wet diaper, or just sleepy?

She quickly did what I wanted so as not to wake up my father who was sleeping with us.

私の母は赤ちゃんの泣き方を聞いたらすぐに、その原因が分かると言っていました。

お腹が空いたのか、おむつが濡れたのか、ただ眠いだけなのか。

一緒に寝ている父を起こさないように、素早く私の望むようにしたそうです。

If we sleep together every day, we may come to understand the emotions of babies who cannot speak.

The same thing can be said for babies. They grow up observing the words, actions, and emotions of their mothers, who have been living in close proximity to them since birth.

毎日一緒に寝ていると、言葉が話せない赤ちゃんの感情も分かってくるのかもしれませんね。

また、赤ちゃんにも同じ事が言えます。生まれた時から近い距離で過ごしている母親の言動や感情をずっと観察しながら育つのですから。

It's not just in the bedroom.

In Japan, where private rooms are not part of the culture, people have long lived in close proximity to other family members.

Today, houses are becoming more Westernized, and most of them use walls and doors instead of sliding doors to create private rooms. However, since the houses themselves are small, it is impossible to live without feeling each other's presence.

寝室だけではありません。

個室の文化でない日本では、昔から家族同士の気配を身近に感じながら暮らしてきました。

現代では家も洋風化が進んでおり、襖の代わりに壁やドアにより個室を作る家がほとんどです。とはいえ、家自体が狭いため、お互いの気配を感じずに暮らす事は不可能と言えるでしょう。

It may be an everyday occurrence for us Japanese to read the health and emotions of our family members through their trivial words and actions.

家族の健康や感情を、些細な言動により読み取る事は、私達日本人の日常かもしれません。

I believe that maybe we didn't need to use direct words of love because we could feel it without saying "I love you" to each other.

「愛してる」とお互いに言葉にしなくても、それを感じる事ができるため、直接的な愛の言葉を使う必要がなかったのかもしれないと、私は考えています。

次回はこの話をもう少し具体的にお話したいと思います。お楽しみに！

In my next article, I would like to talk about this in more detail. See you soon.